If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
