I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
