so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
