did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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