He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
