So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
