I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
