1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
