i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
