carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
