help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize