Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Randomize
