i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
