OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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