Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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