I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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