At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
