What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm both gender and math confused
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
