well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
