PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
