He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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