You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
