im so drunk with asians
where?
always
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize