just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
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