if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
