did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize