i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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