how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
