You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize
