This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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