i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize