I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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