While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
