ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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