Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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