just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Mom said you looked used
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize