Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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