that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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