By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
