Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
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