How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
