Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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