She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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