a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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