Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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