Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Pants are for mortals
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
