ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
