I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
The Olympian is in my bed
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
