let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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