In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize